Big Daddy Roses Big Day

Al, Now look at all the commotion you've caused today..............and you thought no one cared.......................Shheeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiittt! You drew ME into a fray I could care less about, but only for you do I do these things..................LOL!!! Take care Buddy! TCE

Glad you got my back....

Yeah, I got your back......................your front, now that's a different story.......As someone once said, you're only gay if ...'.. ,,, ... ,,,,,, .. ,, ... &%$, or ... ,,, ....... ,,, #@%$. TCE

Well, as Doc so crustily put it, ( but there's no way to improve on it) "I ain't gay... Hell, I ain't even HAPPY much anymore... Fuck I love that...

Where's J-werk? Someone better kick that boys ass up around his ears and push him back in the game!!! Step right up my son, and let me help you to laugh again!!!!!!!! TCE

Yes, well now Doc, well there's someone I need to connect with............Infinite wisdom takes no backseat!! TCE

Okay J-werk, I'll leave this for you for whenever you decide to come back online........................... Okay, hmmmm, let's see.................something small..............Oh, I know!!!!!!!.......... Two peanuts were walking down the street,,,,and one was a salted,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, and the other was a roasted,,,,,,,,,, for assault!!!! What did one casket say to the other casket? "Is that you coffin'"?. What did one hot dog say to the other hot dog? "Hi Frank!".................................... Moooooooooaaaaaaaaaaannnn. TCE

You're fuckin killing me TCE....

All good TCE...Just got home after throwing down a few....Much respect.... J

Now... that was just painful. eesh.

Alright TCE, here's one for ya: Late one night a woman stops into a 24-hour convenient store. She gets a frozen dinner, a pint of ice cream, and a cheap bottle of wine. She places the items on the counter and waits for the cashier to give her the total. As she hands him the money he takes one look at her and then one look at the items she purchased and says, "You're single aren't you?" With a look of amazement she replied, "Well, yes I am. How did you know?" The cashier takes another look at the items and looks at her and says, "Because you're fucking ugly."

J-werk, Now you're talking my language MF!!!!! Here's one you've all heard before................. A group of CIA cadets are finishing up their training. A young cadet, 25 years old is called into the directors office, whereupon the director says to him "Congratulations, you've excelled in your training, and scored extremely well on your exams. This is your final test." He then pulls a gun from a drawer in his desk and slides it across to the lad, and says "We have your new wife in the other room. I want you to take this gun, and I want you to kill her.". Without hesitation, the young man replies "I can't do that, that's my wife, I love her!" The director informs him that since he can't perform the task, he's obviously not CIA material, and requests that he leave. The next guy in is 35 years old. The same exchange takes place, "Congratulations, blah blah blah, I want you to take this gun.", and so forth. The guy sits and looks at the gun before replying, I'm sorry, I just can't do that. The final guy through the door that day is 45 years old. "Congratulations, you've done extremely well, this is your final test." The guy picks up the gun and walks out to the hallway and into the other room, then the shots are heard. 20 seconds or so later, the officials hear a lot of commotion coming from the room and burst in to see what's happening. The CIA director yells out "What the hell is going on in here!?!". The cadet yells back to him "Some son of a bitch put blanks in the gun, I had to choke the bitch to death!!!!!!!!!!!!" TCE

And if you don't like that one, I have more.........

Two Scott's are walking down a dirt road throw there small village. The oldest one looks at the youngest one and says, " Do ya see the houses on the hill there, lad? I build every single one with me bare hands but do you ever hear anyone say, 'Look! Here comes Argile, the house builder?' NO!" They walk a bit further and the the oldest one says again, "Do ya see the boats down in the bay there lad? I built everyone with me bare hands but do you ever hear any one say, 'Look. Here comes Argile the boat builder.' NO!" ..... "But you fuck one goat."....

What's the difference between a chicken and a lawyer?................... ................................The chicken clucks defiance~~~~~~~~ What's the difference between a Porsche and a porcupine?................The porcupine's prick is on the outside!!!!!!!! What's the difference between Mich-el Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Mich-el Jackson fucks little boys (speculatively). How many f-gs does it take to put in a lightbulb? Only one, but it takes an entire emergency room crew to get it out!!! TCE

Man takes his son to the circus. During the show the clowns come out to perform their act. At one point one of the clowns asks for a voluteer. The man raises his hand to humor his son, assuming that he won't get picked. Oddly enough he is called down to the center circle. The clown says, "I am going to ask you a couple of questions and then I will guess your name." The man nods and the clowns asked, "Are you a horse?" The man replied, "No." The clown then asked, "Are you a mule?" And once again the man replied, "No." The clown looks at his and then turns to the crowd and says, "Well then he must be a jackass!" As the crowd laughed the man began to become angered and vowed revenge on the clown. Immediately the next day the man began taking insult classes and for a full year practiced and practiced until the circus came back to town. And right on schedual when the circus arrived the man took his son. And as usual the clowns came out to do their routine and as usual the same clown asked for a volunteer. Seeing his chance the man ran out to the middle circle and offered to voluteer. The clown said, "Very well. Since you are so eager, i will ask you a couple of questions and then i will gues your name." The man simply nodded. So the clown asked, "Are you a horse?" The man replied, "No." The clown then asked, "Are you a mule?" And once again the man replied, "No." The clown looks at his and then turns to the crowd and says, "Well then he must be a jackass!" As the crowd laughed the man grabbed the mic from the clown and said, "FUCK YOU CLOWN!" *was that a tomato that just flew by?*

I think it was a pumpkin............................Whew!

Why's it so hard for women to pee in the morning? Ever tried peeling apart a grilled cheese sandwich!?

Don't make me start in on the harelip jokes.... I'll do it!

Oh, please, please, please.........................I'm an equal opportunity offender.........

you asked for it.... WHAT GOES "MARC MARC"? A dog with a harelip.

theval would appreciate that one.........................too bad she's on VACA...................hey, when the hell is she coming back!?! She was great late night conversation. I only know one harelip joke, and it takes too long to do on hare, er, I mean, here. Did you hear the one about the harelip that was looking to buy a horse? TCE

Hey J-werk, Know any whitey jokes? I know there's gotta be a shitload of 'em, but they all is keepin' 'em to demselves. TCE

"No No No! Not Twat! ...Trott!" God! One of my favs.... You know the one about the harelip selling fly dope to the farmer?

We're gonna get a bad wrap as klansmen if we keep it up....................wrap, get it!?! Why no, I haven't heard that one....................

Harelip walks up to a farmer and say, "Why excuthe me thir but I wath wondering if you would be interethested in purchathing some world famouth Fly Dope?" The farmer politely declined but the Harelip begged him to reconsider. "Thir, pleath. I haven't made a thale all week and I have a wife and two kidths to feed. I tell ya what I'll do. I'll take all my clothes off, rubb this world famouth Fly Dope all over my body and you can tie me to that fencth posth over there and at the end of the day you will be a believer!" The farmer said, "I really don't want to do this but if you insist, I'll go along with it." The Harelip replied, "OH thank you thir! You won't be disthapointed!" So the Harelip takes his clothes off, rubs the flydope all over his body and the farmer tied him to the fence post and headed off to do his chores. Late in the evening as the farmer ate his dinner he realized that he had forgotten all about the Harelip. The farmer jumps in his truck and speeds out to the gence post where he had left the harelip. The farmer jumps out and runs over to the Harelip who is now badly sunburnt and barely aboe to satnd and says, "My God sir I am so sorry that I forgot you where out here!" The Harelip replied, "That's okay, that's okay. Asth you can thee there are no flys what-tho-ever on my body. But I do have one questhion." ANd the farmer said, "What's that?" And the Harelip answered, "Does that calf have a mother?"

Bump for TCE...There's your joke ya sicko!

How many hippies does it take to screw in a lightbuld? ......................... They don't screw in lightbulbs they screw in dirty sleeping bags.

*Tomato*....*lol*

Hey, how do ya get 100 hippies out of a swimming pool? Throw in a bar of soap!!!

You know what's grosser than gross?.... Falling 100- stories ass first onto a bicycle with no seat.

Two guys walk into a bar. Third guy ducks.

A repeat: How many piano's did Liberace have? I don't know either, but I hear he had organs up the ass!!! TCE

What do ya call a prositute with a runny nose?.....FULL, ya I know,but YOU laughed, right. Has anyone heard the story of just how it came to be that an angel sits on top of a Christmas tree?...Doc

Two antennas met on a rooftop. They fell in love and got married. The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was great. *thanks, I'm here all week.*

Oh MY GOD!!!.... TIM(TCE) has a female clone!!!!!

Yeah, but does she have a nine inch............................tongue, and a pignose? TCE